By Turtle MacBridePosts are popping up on the web concerning former Vice President Dick Cheney, characterizing him as a no-nonsense, blunt, in-your-face kind of conservative, with a good dollop of cursing, guns and virility thrown in for context.
Here’s an example, someone posted top ten Cheney quotes:
10. “You think that was torture? Come over here and I’ll show you torture.”Other posts seem to blur the distinction between Cheney and the Zeus of the internet Chuck Norris:
9. "The Secret Service's new job? Protecting other world leaders from me."
8. "I'll crush all enemies foreign and domestic. Then I'll figure out a goal for Week Two."
7. "I shot a guy in the face and he apologized to me."
6. "Democrats will need Universal Health Care after I'm through with them."
5. "Want to see world leaders bowing? Oh, they'll bow alright."
4. "Do what I say or I'll have my daughter kick your $*%."
3. "On my World Apology Tour, I won't be the one apologizing."
2. "I never had a heart attack. I just stopped it a few times to show it who was boss."
1. "Vote for me. Or not. Like I give a *!#& what you do."
“You’d rather me on your side than against you.”Then there are posts that appear to simply substitute Cheney for Norris, such as:
“Experience, leadership, normal-sized ears.”
“I shoot my friends in the face with a shotgun. What do you think I’ll do to America’s enemies?”
“I’m what the Mayans predicted.”
“Heart attacks don’t even slow me down.”
“The only time I’ll bow before a foreign leader is in preparation for an uppercut.”
“I already control everything; let’s just make it official.”
“Probably not going to win a Nobel Peace Prize.”
“KSM will get to plead his case to my shotgun.”
“You want a change? How about a president who doesn’t give a rat’s ass what anyone thinks about him.”
“You don’t inaugurate me; you unleash me.”
“I will say, ‘Mr. Ahmadinejad, tear off your own face.’ And he will do as I tell him.”
“It’s not a smirk. You’re just not worth the attention of my whole face.”
Dick Cheney is so tough, he sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Dick Cheney went on vacation to the Virgin islands. After he got back, they were just called “the Islands.”
Other posts propose the dream team of Dick Cheney and Sarah Palin for 2012. I mean, could you imagine President Sarah Palin courtesying to the Emporer of Japan? Why do I suppose Palin would be the Presidential candidate? Vice President is not subject to term-limits.











